After the diagnosis
An autism diagnosis is a pivotal moment in a parent’s life — and for many, it comes as a shock at first.
Do you not yet have a diagnosis, only a suspicion? Then Before the diagnosis is the more useful page – it covers where to turn, waiting times and what is already possible without a report.
Some parents feel relief once they finally have an explanation for their child’s behavior, while others may find themselves struggling with fear or grief about the diagnosis.
Once the new circumstances have been processed and accepted, new questions and worries often start to pile up: about the future, care, therapy options, education and social inclusion. On top of that, some parents also encounter prejudice, a lack of understanding, or even discrimination in society.
For these and other reasons, supporting a child on the autism spectrum can be mentally and emotionally demanding.
If your family lives in the UK, the practical next steps are not the German ones described further down. The short version: ask the local authority for an EHC needs assessment in England, or have additional support needs looked at in Scotland; claim DLA (England and Wales) or Child Disability Payment (Scotland) now rather than later, because DLA is not backdated and every month of waiting is money gone; and check whether Carer’s Allowance applies to you. None of it waits for the diagnosis. The whole route, with the current rates and deadlines →
From my own experience
I have lived through this myself as a mother. That’s why I can truly understand other parents and their worries — and why you, as parents, can draw on the experience I’ve gathered along the way.
A broad spectrum — support tailored to your child
Autism is a broad spectrum that encompasses many different traits and needs, which is exactly why support has to be tailored to each individual.
My role is to offer people on the autism spectrum and their families guidance, support and resources — helping them navigate the challenges that can come with autism, and improving quality of life for everyone involved.
First steps after the diagnosis
There is no fixed roadmap — and no one has to manage everything at once. The points below can offer a first sense of direction. Take all the time you need.
Arrive & take a breath
A diagnosis deserves time to sink in. Feelings like relief, worry or grief all have their place — there is no “right” way to feel.
Inform yourself calmly
Reliable information helps the first fog to lift. Bundesverband Autismus Deutschland e. V. (the national autism association) and regional counseling centers are good places to start. Well-grounded background is also available in my knowledge base, with 308 scientific studies (2015–2026), each checked. If you would like to go deeper: the background texts explain individual questions in detail — for example the difference between screening and diagnosis.
Find points of contact
Autism therapy centers (Autismus-Therapie-Zentren, ATZ), early-intervention centers (Frühförderstellen) and social-pediatric centers (Sozialpädiatrische Zentren, SPZ) can help and point out possible next steps.
Understand your support options
For your information: in certain cases in Germany, support through integration assistance (Eingliederungshilfe, § 35a SGB VIII — integration assistance for children and adolescents under German social law) via the responsible Jugendamt (youth welfare office) may be an option. Whether this applies to your situation is decided by the Jugendamt on a case-by-case basis.
Ease everyday life
Dependable structures, routines and small adjustments in daily life take the pressure off — for your child and for the whole family.
Reach out for support
You don’t have to walk this path alone. A conversation with someone who listens and understands the situation can bring relief and a sense of direction.
Step by step: the Mika Guide
The free Mika Guide takes you from the first suspicion all the way to an approved application – with checklists and contact addresses. It works right in your browser and can be installed on your home screen.
Downloads about 3.7 MB once, then works offline – no account needed.
What can come along with autism — and what is not the same thing
Autism rarely comes on its own. ADHD, anxiety, sleep problems, eating peculiarities and — above all where there is an additional developmental delay — epilepsy often come with it. That is not worse news but better news: autism itself is not treated, these accompanying conditions very much are.
If your child does not (yet) speak
A child who does not speak still has something to say. Augmentative and alternative communication — picture cards, signs, speech-generating devices — is not a substitute for language and not an admission that language has been given up on. Studies show that children speak not less but rather more as a result. Access runs through speech therapy, the SPZ (social-pediatric centre) or a counselling office; the devices are aids that can be prescribed. Do not wait for the diagnosis before starting.
Which approaches exist — and what “supported by evidence” means here
After the diagnosis, names start to fly: early intervention, autism therapy, ABA, ESDM, TEACCH, PECS, JASPER, augmentative communication. I will sort them here without taking a decision away from you — your family makes it, and it depends on your child, not on a ranking.
Two sentences first, which put everything in place. Autism is not an illness that is treated until it is gone. No approach reverses autism, and none should. If support can achieve something, it is this: opening up communication, lowering strain, making participation possible. That is also the measure of whether an offer fits.
What is well studied. The most robust evidence lies with approaches that start in everyday life and involve the parents — naturalistic developmental behavioral interventions, abbreviated NDBI. These include programs such as ESDM (Early Start Denver Model), JASPER and Project ImPACT. Two large reviews (Project AIM 2019 and 2023) reach the same conclusion: for social communication this is the most solid evidence — and at the same time the effects are smaller than advertising copy suggests, once you count only the methodologically strict studies. Both belong in the same sentence.
What opens up communication. If your child speaks little or not at all, augmentative and alternative communication (AAC) is neither a last resort nor a step backward: picture cards, symbol boards or a device with speech output. The worry that it prevents speech has been studied and was not confirmed; it is rather worth adding AAC early instead of saving it as a final option. PECS, a structured picture-card system, is the best known single approach within it.
What creates structure. TEACCH is not a therapy program but a design idea: make sequences visible, assign rooms clearly, make tasks recognizable from beginning to end. Much of it appears in this guide under other names — the weekly plan on the wall, the timer, the retreat corner. I am qualified in it and work with it.
Where I draw a line: ABA. Applied behavior analysis is the most frequently studied approach and is widely recommended internationally. I do not offer it nonetheless, and I want to be open about why. The dispute is not primarily about effectiveness but about the goal: when a program is measured by how far a child appears inconspicuous, the child pays for it — with adaptation, with masking, with exhaustion. Autistic adults have reported this for years, and the professional debate has taken it up (you will find an ethical analysis of it in the knowledge base). My stance is neurodiversity-friendly: it is not the child that is made to fit, but the setting. That is a reasoned decision — not a statement that families who decided otherwise have harmed their child. If you are considering ABA, the question I would ask is always the same: how is progress measured here?
What this means for you in practice. Four questions are more useful with any offer than any list of methods:
- Who carries it out? Approaches you support in everyday life work across the whole day — not only in the therapy hour.
- What does it aim at? At communication, self-regulation and participation — or at the child standing out less?
- How much does it demand? A program that exhausts the family is not a good plan even when it performs well in studies.
- May your child say no? Where that is not provided for, I would look very closely.
And what you can skip. There is no diet, no supplement and no “detox” that reduces autism; some of it is dangerous. Anyone promising a cure is selling something.
Realistically, about the situation in Germany. The choice is often not a real choice: autism therapy centers and early intervention services have waiting lists, and what is available locally decides more often than the evidence does. That is bitter, but it also takes pressure off — you do not have to find the theoretically best program, but a workable one. What is possible in your region we can sort out in conversation.
You will find the studies on every approach named here in the knowledge base, filtered by early intervention and communication.
What you can do now
If you’d like a next step, I’d be glad to walk it with you:
- Autism counseling: finding direction together, easing everyday life and developing strategies you can rely on — rooted in professional expertise and lived experience.
- Tellington TTouch for you®: a gentle, complementary method for relaxation and well-being that can support calm and trust.
Note: Tellington TTouch for you® is a complementary method for relaxation and well-being, not a substitute for medical or therapeutic treatment. This counseling does not constitute a medical diagnosis or treatment.
Common questions after the diagnosis
What does the diagnosis mean?
The diagnosis describes a different way of perceiving and processing information — not anyone’s fault and no verdict on your child. At the same time it describes a real need for support: much is exhausting precisely because the surroundings are built for a different kind of perception. It is exactly this need that applications and Nachteilsausgleiche (compensations for disadvantages) recognise — not a shortcoming in your child. Autism is a broad spectrum: every person brings their own strengths and their own needs. So the diagnosis is above all an explanation, one that can make it easier to see your child and to find the right support. My guiding idea: behavior is communication.
What happens next?
There is no fixed roadmap. It often helps to take your time, gather information calmly, ease the pressure of everyday life and build structures you can rely on. Points of contact such as autism therapy centers (Autismus-Therapie-Zentren), early-intervention centers (Frühförderstellen) or social-pediatric centers (Sozialpädiatrische Zentren) can help. For orientation: in certain cases, support through integration assistance (Eingliederungshilfe, § 35a SGB VIII) via the responsible Jugendamt (youth welfare office) may be an option — whether that applies is decided by the Jugendamt on a case-by-case basis.
Who can help?
Good first points of contact are Bundesverband Autismus Deutschland e. V. (the national autism association), regional autism therapy centers (Autismus-Therapie-Zentren, ATZ), early-intervention centers (Frühförderstellen) and social-pediatric centers (Sozialpädiatrische Zentren, SPZ), as well as the responsible Jugendamt (youth welfare office). In addition, I can support you with autism counseling and — as a complementary well-being method — with Tellington TTouch for you®. A free initial consultation is available with no obligation.
Note on the legal information
This information has been compiled to the best of my knowledge, but it is not legal advice — laws, amounts and procedures change, and every case is different. What is binding is the applicable law and the decision of the responsible authority; I cannot accept liability. For important decisions, the free independent participation counseling (EUTB) or a social welfare association can help.
Status: August 2026. Law, amounts and procedures change — in the UK, benefit rates are normally uprated every April. What applies at the time of your application is what counts; please check it with the office responsible.
Are you at the very beginning of this journey?
If you have questions, are looking for advice, or simply need someone who truly understands what you’re going through: I’m here for you. A free initial consultation is available with no obligation.